3:40 Husband calls. On his way home from a long day of overtime work on a Saturday. Declares that we should go out to eat. Wife stresses over the thought of mixing a restaurant with a baby who hasn’t napped. Must get baby to nap now.
3:55 Baby goes down for nap. Hooray! Wife picks up the computer to search for hold-my-baby’s-socks-on devices and knows she’s wasting time.
4:05 Husband gets home, scolds wife for wasting time on the computer, flops down on the couch. Hypocrite. Preschooler goes through regular routine of welcoming Dad home: screaming, jumping on the couches, running from living room to front door to kitchen to living room. Repeat. Do we really want to go out? Maybe we should order take out. Wouldn’t it be nice to get out of the house? Is it a bigger hassle to get all ready?
4:30 Wife still on the computer. Baby still sleeping. Husband still slouched on couch. Preschooler still spastic, wearing only underwear from naptime.
4:45 Baby’s awake. GET OFF COMPUTER! Prepare dinner for Baby, change out of sweats into real clothes, put pants on Preschooler. Ahh! Have to pump! Check diaper bag. Dog needs let out. Don’t forget to warm an bottle for the restaurant! Go warm the truck!
5:25 Leave the house! Head to the restaurant. Participate in “how was your day?” small talk.
5:40 Restaurant is PACKED. Husband can’t believe it’s already this “late.” Circle the parking lot, back on the road. Where to now? This one? PACKED. That one? PACKED. Annoyed. Discussion of options ensues. Preschooler hears the conversation and chimes in, “MCDONALDS!” Repeats request incessantly, louder, louder, LOUDER. Baby, who has recently found her voice, joins in. LOUD NOISES!!
5:55 Husband and Wife continue brainstorming. Truck passes McDonalds. Volcanic meltdown! Wife holds head in hands. Husband loses patience. MORE LOUD NOISES!
6:00 Truck stops at train track. Meltdown continues. Wife realizes Baby’s bedtime is in an hour. Anxiety.
6:10 Settle on a restaurant without a wait. Pizza. Exciting! Why didn’t we order in?
8:00 Wife opens bottle of wine. Flops down on couch, comfy in sweat pants.
Who says a mother sacrifices wild weekend nights? My Saturday nights are still crazy.
3 comments:
lololol omg I love this post. I made Steve come over and read it. SO TRUE! 5:40pm is late, loud noises make you pull your hair out, and going out is way too much work. Hahaha.
I'm no help in figuring out how to do dinner out as a family after 4 p.m., but maybe I can help with the sock situation? We've tried everything, and the only socks that stay on are from Walmart, in the baby section. They're the white athletic socks with gray toes, a generic brand I think. Not super cute, but they stay on at night!
@Julie, thanks for the tip! I still haven't decided on or found anything I like, but I may have to check out those socks. I'm looking into just getting Robeeze or similar shoes, but then I have the problem of deciding on styles/colors/designs I like :)
Post a Comment